theden 3 days ago

In the HTML there's a cool comment

      <!-- Hello this is Theo. Yes I know how to do web design. -->
      <!-- You have found my secret message. -->
      <!-- It is a coin emoticon picture. -->
      <!--
                     ______________
        __,.,---'''''              '''''---..._
     ,-'                                       '`-.
    |                      ONE                     |
    |                    THNICKEL                  ,
    |'-.._                                    __,,-
    |      ''`---.....______________.....---''     |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
    |                                              |
     '-.._                                   __,,-`
          ''`---.....______________.....---''
    -->
  • kmoser 2 days ago

    That "stretching" (!) the definition of "emoticon." I would call it ASCII art.

    • bigyabai 2 days ago

      If it was emoticon-sized then you wouldn't be able to appreciate the tasteful thickness of some wide wampum.

  • jasonm23 2 days ago

    Proudly built with Frontpage 98 ... I nearly spit my coffee.

  • account42 a day ago

    This is exactly what the internet should be.

    • kcplate 18 hours ago

      It made me happy to see it and updated in 2025. I miss this internet.

theodorenichols 2 days ago

Hello This is Theo. I have paused sale of the Coins to handle pre-orders. There are some left for Later. Thank You for your interest in substantial coinage

  • a_c 2 days ago

    I like your page. Wish more web pages are like that. Would you ship to the UK when open to order again?

  • sizzle 2 days ago

    The man, myth, and legend himself! Can I get a coin?

    • theodorenichols 2 days ago

      I will (benevolently) accept a trade of some of your thin coins for a thick one. Next week1

      P.S. It will require aLARGE quantity of thin coins, due to their relative worthlessness and pathetic Nature

      • sizzle 2 hours ago

        Where may I send the thin coins or will digital coins suffice?

      • lxgr 2 days ago

        Would feeble personal cheques or money orders be acceptable too, despite featuring at least 50% fewer dimensions?

        • theodorenichols 2 days ago

          iF THE BANK ACCOUNT BACKING THE CHEQUE IS NOT SIMILARLY enfeebled

          • lxgr 2 days ago

            Backed by the full faith and credit of a person you met on the Internet.

  • wsve 2 days ago

    Do you plan to branch out to new coin lines?

    • theodorenichols 2 days ago

      Yes I am considering an annual release of thicker coins nickels are not the only coin suffering from slight stature

atomic_cowprod 2 days ago

Theo: I'm not sure if you still read this echo, but I've been trying to call you about my pre-order, but it looks like your BBS is still down. If you can get back to me, send me netmail. I'm at 1:342/76 for Fido and 11:420/69 for MJNet.

-- SLMR/2 2.4b Origin: Sunnyside Acres -- (203) 555-1212 -- 1:342/76

Windows is not a virus, viruses DO something.

  • crike 2 days ago

    He’s busy minting with his hammer.

  • theodorenichols 2 days ago

    Hello Mr. Prod,

    I do not understand your message but you may send me an e-Mail or reach me here

Aardwolf 2 days ago

I like the throwback 1998 design while it's created in 2025. They got it down even to the colored grain on the photographs and text with jpeg artifacts on them - even though that is something that actually did improve in 2025 :)

  • bartread 2 days ago

    > that is something that actually did improve in 2025

    Aye, but the old skool way fits the overall aesthetic better. They've even got a few animated GIFs.

    I actually really love the way this site looks - I miss the days when most websites looking something like this, especially where they've avoided going full Christmas tree with the design. And look at how fast it loads.

  • qsort 2 days ago

    It might be 1998 design, but I'd much rather visit a 1998 website than the vast majority of "modern" stuff. My other screen has Teams on it and without a shred of irony and before accounting for the waste of resources, that website looks way better to me than an allegedly professional application does.

  • xnorswap 2 days ago

    It hotlinks geocities via the wayback machine cache. I'd tut but hotlinking others' random images is very on-brand for 90's web design too.

velcrovan 2 days ago

Admins/mods: you should strip the Beehiiv link id from the link. https://thick-coins.net/

  • LeifCarrotson 2 days ago

    And HN users should run the "ClearURLs" extension[1] (or similar) to automatically strip these and other tracking links from their browser.

    Or at least read the URL they've entered when posting and manually prune unnecessary parameters.

    [1]: https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/clearurls/

    • lxgr 2 days ago

      Or consider using Firefox, which has a native "Copy clean link" context menu option. Very useful!

    • jxmorris12 2 days ago

      My bad. Do they make this for Chrome?

      • WorldPeas 2 days ago

        I believe brave has this functionality, and an adblocker

      • mrguyorama 2 days ago

        Only until it affects Google's bottom line.

    • igor47 2 days ago

      Whoa the list of required permissions for you extension is long and scary.

Chant-I-CRW 3 days ago

Dang...sure would like some thnickels of my own. After that tree fell on my house it is really windy here. I could use something heavy to hold down my punch cards.

  • CoastalCoder 3 days ago

    I suggest buying a Three Wolves t-shirt.

    I once saw a guy in a similar predicament. To address this, he donned his Three Wolves shirt and stood in an empty meadow by his house. Within 15 minutes there were 10-12 attractive women (some single, some not) circling him in a tight formation.

    He returned to his house and sat near the pile of punch cards (or coupons, I forget). His ad hoc harem sat as well so they could study his chiseled features, which kept the coupons safe from blowing away.

    I've heard that although the coupons have long-since expired, the women happily remain.

    • Chant-I-CRW 2 days ago

      Legend. I could use a harem too. These punch cards aren't going to punch themselves.

    • Mtinie 2 days ago

      Your unexpected anecdote perfectly encapsulates why I love HN!

jcattle 2 days ago

I love where he describes his minting facility:

"My new state of some art facility is equipped with several tools and a powerful workhorse (me)!"

waltbosz 3 days ago

I think this is a joke by Alan Wagner who goes by the handle truewagner. https://truewagner.com/ . You'll have to Google his socials to find his art.

lqet 2 days ago

> Website proudly built with FrontPage 98.

  • Mtinie 2 days ago

    You know it’s old school when it’s not “built with love”. :)

    • nartho 2 days ago

      "Built with ♥ by our code monkeys"

      • 65 2 days ago

        "Buy me a coffee"

  • alexjplant 2 days ago

    I proudly built my grandpa's photography website with a sheet-fed scanner and a copy of FrontPage 98 when I was in the third grade. Sadly it was hosted on the municipal utility commission's site and wasn't crawled by Archive.org so it's lost to time :-(.

  • morkalork 2 days ago

    Takes me back to grade 9 and doing a group project in the library where everyone had to make a website on their topics in FrontPage. Whoever came up with that idea must have a tech true believer gen-Xer. It was actually kinda fun.

  • gazpachotron 2 days ago

    One of the best things about FrontPage is the book that Charles Ferguson wrote about starting it, building it, and selling it to Microsoft: High Stakes, No Prisoners: A Winner's Tale of Greed and Glory in the Internet Wars.

IAmGraydon 3 days ago

I miss this web.

  • patates 3 days ago

    Start something in neocities and join a webring!

  • rambambram 2 days ago

    No you don't. The web misses you.

  • komali2 3 days ago

    Apparently it still exists! My friend keeps trying to get me to join his webring, whatever that is, sounds like a potential way to connect together websites like this though.

lordleft 2 days ago

This what I miss about what the internet used to be.

schoen 3 days ago

Since there's no specific verb in the Latin motto, perhaps it should be in the nominative ("nummi crassiores omnibus")?

  • Freak_NL 3 days ago

    Romanes eunt domus!

    • theoreticalmal 2 days ago

      People called Romans they go the house??

      • yard2010 2 days ago

        "Romanian people go home"

  • 1-more 2 days ago

    Very amateur latinist but I'd say it works as Accusative of Exclamation with an implied "dō"

kshehab1 3 days ago

Sadly I missed the window for thnickle pre orders but hopefully I'll be around for the thennies if the fog doesnt get me by then

  • bigyabai 3 days ago

    It's only a matter of Thimes.

  • meepmorp 2 days ago

    eventually, we'll have thalers (again)

nsb1 2 days ago

But why not 'Thickel'?? It was right there!

  • justusthane 2 days ago

    Because "thnickel" is funnier.

    • layer8 2 days ago

      Too close to thinckels. You might order the wrong ones.

  • dasil003 2 days ago

    Shades of "you need a thneed"

  • lproven 9 hours ago

    Because it's a pun on his name, I would think.

    THeo NICHOLS -> THNICHOLS -> THNICKELS

    ... no?

naikrovek 2 days ago

This is one of the best things I have ever seen.

1oooqooq 2 days ago

the design is old but it's marketing is very modern. showing feet to get money from strangers is very contemporary.

PaulHoule 3 days ago

It's an urban legend at the very least that you can improve the power of your punch by grasping a coin roll. I'm not so sure it's good for your hands but unlike a knife or brass knuckles you have some deniability. (Reminds me of the time that the store manager of a supermarket wrongly thought I was shoplifting and he followed me out with his clipboard which I'm sure he planned to whack me with and say it was an accident if I gave him any trouble.)

  • sandworm101 3 days ago

    A roll of coins, or any other heavy object, will significantly increase your punching power. Short of ninjas or mma fighters, the average person doesnt have the twitch ability to throw a significant punch. By adding mass, you increase power without needing the speed. Hands are very light. Even a small mass increase will make a big difference.

    • vunderba 3 days ago

      Yup. In fact, while boxing gloves are ostensibly for the protection of the fighters hands, the increased mass (approx 10oz for heaver weight classes) significantly ups the chance of a concussive strike and/or knockout.

      So... it is kind of a mixed bag in terms of if they actually make fights safer.

      • bichiliad 3 days ago

        Relatedly: - The padding in fights is much lighter than in practice or sparring. The added weight is good for conditioning, blunts sharp impacts, and slows down your speed. - If you spar anyone, you're expected to have at _least_ 14oz gloves. If your gym says otherwise, don't spar there (and arguably, don't train anywhere that doesn't take safety seriously). - Luis Resto, a boxer, was jailed for swapping the padding in his gloves with plaster. He ended the career and permanently damaged the eyesight of his opponent, Billy Collins Jr.

        • dmurray 2 days ago

          This seems a bit arbitrary since MMA gloves are lighter than boxing gloves. If you spar someone at an MMA gym you'll be throwing the exact same punches, but you won't be using 14 oz gloves.

      • globular-toast 2 days ago

        I thought it was more because they can punch harder without breaking their hands.

        • sandworm101 2 days ago

          Modern gloves are to spread out the impact to prevent cuts, blood, which was not allowed on TV once upon a time. The big puffy gloves only appeared when boxing looked to mainstream itself, to move out of the bars and become broadcast-quality entertainment.

        • bichiliad 2 days ago

          That protection mostly comes from wraps, which you wear under your gloves

    • com2kid 3 days ago

      Learning how to throw a punch isn't that much work and gives you a huge multiple on power output.

      Also throwing a bare knuckle punch against someone's head has a large likelihood of the puncher breaking multiple bones, though depending on the outcome that may be preferable to other alternatives.

      • thechao 2 days ago

        Most people tend to punch with a loose hand to the top of the head: this simultaneously increases the chance of breaking their hand; reduces the impact force; and, strikes one of the most insensitive & hardest parts of the body (the skull). Trained fighters are targeting an untucked chin with a short high acceleration punch (jab, uppercut), with a tight fist. It is technically very challenging to do this, even for professionals.

        In general: use your sneakers; if necessary, push opponents away with with your palms and tightly held fingers.

        • com2kid 17 hours ago

          > In general: use your sneaker

          This is indeed the 1st, 2nd, and frequently 3rd, suggested strategy from any good self defense teacher!

    • TZubiri 3 days ago

      Nice, this knowledge will help me grab my keys in some self defense scenario. Will practice on sporting bag to avoid injury and verify force increase.

  • pierrec 3 days ago

    OK, "urban legend at the very least" is a confusing way of putting things, it's kind of like saying "this is false at the very least, possibly even true!" (in this case it's true)

    • PaulHoule 2 days ago

      I’ll concede it was a poor choice of language. I heard about it first in the 1980s but looking for confirmation I could only find low quality evidence such as discussions on Reddit, quora and the like. No newspaper reports, no confessions that “I broke somebody’s nose”, no criminal charges, no discussions by martial arts instructors, nothing.

mhuffman 2 days ago

No ridges on the sides? This could be be trouble!

  • michelpp 2 days ago

    Usd nickles have smooth edges.

korse 2 days ago

Has anyone called the listed phone number?

cainxinth 2 days ago

If you thought getting hit with a sock full regular nickels was bad, you ain’t seen nothing yet!

syedumaircodes 2 days ago

I want a thnickel so bad, hit me up when you start taking orders again

dmitrygr 2 days ago

This is the internet i'll miss when it is fully drowned in ML slop.

gtbcb 3 days ago

How much were they?

  • CSSer 3 days ago

    The design is ancient, but the dates are current.

xnx 3 days ago

How does this website load so fast? Must be some advanced framework with JIT edge hydration. /s

  • eclipticplane 3 days ago

    > Website proudly built with FrontPage 98

    • TZubiri 3 days ago

      You know how antiques have a binomial distribution of value over time? They are valuable when new or very old, but trash when freshly obsolete.

      I think classic style websites are going to come around. Not quite space jam whacky era but better mother fucking website for sure

      • stego-tech 3 days ago

        The success of NeoCities and static blog sites in general suggests you’re correct. Best of all, AI can’t produce sites that awesomely terrible - it’s a hallmark of authentic human creativity, under construction banners and all.

        • zxexz 3 days ago

          I can’t produce a website that is half as endearing and fun as my 8yo self’s first attempt around y2k after earnestly reading my dad’s copy of “HTML For the World Wide Web” by Elizabeth Castro. The excitement of page counters, discovering CGI, even creating a really bad click which didn’t two time with JavaScript.

        • williamdclt 2 days ago

          > Best of all, AI can’t produce sites that awesomely terrible

          I don’t have time (or enough interest) to try it, but I’d be surprised if they couldn’t with some half-decent prompting

    • Cthulhu_ 2 days ago

      Is that a new LLM code assistant?

      • Mtinie 2 days ago

        Given the audience on HN I expect will be up on Hugging Face within an hour or so… :)

        • 1oooqooq 2 days ago

          trained with data up to 1999.

          • imp0cat 2 days ago

            Now you're on to something.

  • Cthulhu_ 2 days ago

    Has to be Rust based SSR using a custom WebRTC based transfer technology.

  • mystified5016 2 days ago

    I'm going to be using "JIT edge hydration" from now on, thanks

  • acheron 3 days ago

    I like your joke and agree wholeheartedly with your point, but it is awfully difficult to upvote a comment that contains “/s”. Usually that’s an auto-downvote.

    Just let your comment stand. You don’t need to call attention to the fact that it’s a joke.

    • yallpendantools 3 days ago

      The Paradox of acheron: In order to point out character sequences that are insufferable in a comment, one's comment must also bear the insufferable character sequence.

    • buggy6257 3 days ago

      you would be both surprised and deeply sad by how many downvotes and comments they would get if they removed the /s

photios 3 days ago

So, no "thicc" jokes yet? Come on, people!

  • Cthulhu_ 2 days ago

    No need, the pun is in the title / on the website already.

fergie 2 days ago

I like the vibe, but is this vibe coded?

  • Cthulhu_ 2 days ago

    No, the footer says it was made in Microsoft Frontpage 98.

    • skinwill 2 days ago

      The way Frontpage would vomit in the source code was the OG AI hallucination.